I haven’t celebrated Mother’s Day in 19 years.
I don’t remember what I gave Maw on that last Mother’s Day, but I vividly remember the happy look on her face when she received it. In the back of my mind, I was thinking about how I’d soon be leaving home for college in Charlotte.
But I did not expect such finality a mere 17 days later.
To make a long story short, I came home early from senior exams and found my mother dying on the bedroom floor. She never regained consciousness.
She was hooked up to a hospital machine long enough for me to gain the composure to tell her how much I loved her and what she meant to me. I just wish she would have been conscious to hear it.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Maw lately – not just because of the anniversary of her death. I’m a couple months of away from turning 37 – the same age when she died. One of her sisters died from a gun at the same age.
While I have a lot of items to check off on my bucket list, if I were to pass today, tomorrow or whenever, I can look back and feel I have lived a fulfilled life. And for that, I have my mother to thank for her love and the way she put a lot of her dreams aside to prepare me for the pursuit of my dreams.